Tuesday, April 29, 2008

A good joke

Patrick and I are both a little obsessed with a certain "pop-culture" phrase of which I am sure you are familiar. The other day, he told me the best joke that utilizes this phrase so perfectly.

What do you get when you cross a brown chicken and a brown cow?

Brown-chicken-brown-cow!!

Which, when said quickly and slurred together, with just the right amount of sass, sounds like "Bow-Chicka-Bow-WOWWW!!"

I can't get over how great that is.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

I coined a new word. This is my official claiming!!

I went to a party last night and met some new people. When asked what I was up to lately, I felt the need to preface my list of things I was "up" to with this simple phrase.

"I am a domestinerd."

Thus, a new word (and identity for myself) was born. What is a domestinerd, you may be asking yourself? Let me give you a list of activities in which a domestinerd would find hours of enjoyment and a great deal of gratification and self-enlightenment. This list defines it better than I could ever put into Webster's form.

- Knitting various clothing or household items. My most recent endeavor is a series of hats that will become Christmas 2008 gifts.

- Sewing clothing. I am sewing myself a couple of aprons to wear while cooking. I have ruined way too many good t-shirts with grease splatters recently. When I finish my own aprons, I have a couple ideas for gifts as well (matching mom & daughter aprons, for one).

- Quilting. I just started my first quilt. I cut all my blocks from 12 fat quarters and didn't want the extra to go to waste, so I cut a series of mini-blocks and sewed them into quilt blocks that will become pillows to match the quilt.

- Cooking. As previously mentioned, I cook. Not because I have to, but because I want to. I decided that since Patrick and I will be out of town for a few days, I will make up recipes from items we have around the house this entire week. That should be interesting...

- Gardening and yard work. There is no better way to kick off a weekend than with a 3-4 hour stint in the yard on a Saturday morning. This weekend, for example, I woke up at 8 on Saturday and sprayed the weeds in the front yard, then fertilized the lawn in the back yard, then blocked out and paved in my strawberry patch, watered my new trees, and weeded the front flower bed. Today, Patrick's dad helped us finish up the bed for our grapes, which we should plant this week. I will finish up the raspberry bed tomorrow. I also started an herb garden and the vegetable garden will start in mid-May.

- Canning. My intention is to grow a shload of fruits and veggies and then can them for winter food storage.

- Decorating. I consider myself to be a fairly decent interior decorator. I'm pretty right-brain enabled. I also love to paint walls and put together color palates for rooms.

There you have it. Domestinerd. It's a perfect description of what I am. Good thing I find balance through reading, playing Nintendo, and working.

I am such a nerd. *tear*

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Unfortunately, sir, your groceries didn't survive the accident. Your Apple window decal, however, was unharmed.



This is a picture of Shane's car in its post-accident status. Pretty heinous sight.

He was passing through a stop light (his light was green) when some crazy chick slammed into him. Apparently she wasn't paying any attention to her driving whatsoever, because she plowed through a red light going an estimated 45 MPH. I hate it when women do things to make the rest of us look completely incompetent. Why must they do that? I would like to point out, for the record, that I have actually avoided accidents that others would have caused, due to my impeccable defensive driving skills. But I digress...

Shane was taken to the hospital, after a very tactful police office told his wife, "He's okay now that we got the car cut off him." He ended up with a few broken bones (pelvis and ribs, I think?), cuts on his face and arms, and glass in quite a few orifices. After a night in the hospital, a few weeks in a wheel chair, some physical therapy, and walking with a cane for awhile, he'll be water-skiing in no time!

We are all just thankful that he came out of the situation as well as he did. Looking on the bright side, he did get a brand new iPhone out of the whole ordeal, since the iPod that was attached to the left side of his belt was obliterated.

Shane, if you need a good attorney, I saw a commercial on TV for this one guy. I hear he can get you, like, a million dollars or something. :P

Friday, April 11, 2008

My celebrity look-alikes....supposedly.....

...On turning 28...

WARNING....This post may be TMI for some....

I was standing in front of the mirror yesterday in my swimsuit, because I was going to get in the hot tub, when I realized something completely unsettling. My boobs are starting to sag. You don't realize these things when wearing a bra. Especially if you don the proper kind of bra, one giving adequate lift and separation. Swimsuits, however, are not quite so forgiving. From now on, I will not wear swimsuits, but instead a full-body wet-suit. I can get away with swimming in that, right?

I have always believed that I would never look old- you know, nipples to my knees, skin like the neck of an elephant (only leathery, rather than gray and hairy). I take care of myself...for the most part. I run, I lift weights, I eat pretty healthy, and I try to wear sunscreen as often as possible. I don't smoke, I brush my teeth religiously, I try to get enough sleep, and I wash my face and put on lotion every night. So why do I feel like I'm falling apart? It's like teen angst part 2- late 20's angst.

So here is what I want for my birthday- I want to be 18 again. If that's not possible, I need $20K for a boob lift and micro-dermabrasion.

I'm done ranting about it now. I will face April 16, 2008 with grace.

*sigh*

Thursday, April 3, 2008

The only thing snow is good for.



I am so sick of snow and so ready for summer. At least, that is what I have been telling myself since January. However, I (finally) downloaded the pictures from my digital camera tonight and found all these pictures from a cross-country ski trip a couple months ago and started feeling nostalgic. Maybe the snow can stick around for a couple more weekends. I need to go skiing a couple more times this season!

What what in the butt.

Let us take a moment to praise Butters for his brave rendition of "What what (in the butt). I really, really hate to admit it....but this song is kind of catchy. I also love Butters in a bear costume.

Numa Numa

I can't get over how much I am obsessed with this song and all pop-culture references to it.